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Why I Hate Children or The Story of Yesterday

Jun. 22nd, 2005 | 03:03 pm
mood: headachy and angry headachy and angry

My manager/owner/boss whatever deserves a very slow painful death. He has a number of kids. The oldest, 10 years old, came to work with him yesterday. This doesn't seem so bad, until you know that the m/o/b was NOT HERE for most of the day. I became the baby-sitter. I do not get paid enough to babysit children AND do all my work. I have shit to do, you know? By the end of the day, I had to go next door and get drunk just to tolerate the little shit. Evil evil evil little child.

Tonight: Possible reunion of the Centenary Bear's Club. If you're in town, call me, Jason, or Colette to get in on some tasty Bear's action.

Later this week: Further loss of my sanity.

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Day From Hell

Jun. 12th, 2005 | 09:16 pm

Today was possibly the worst day I have had in quite some time. Everything has been totally fucked up.

Jason had to work in Texas all day. I was quite excited about this, because it meant I could go run all my boring errands, such as shopping for work food and looking at skirts at Old Navy. Shopping went fantastically. Then, I came home and everything went to shit.

I did a load of laundry right after I came home. I didn't check the pockets on anything, because Jason has been really good at emptying his pockets every night. Not this time. I go to put everything in the dryer, and there's little pieces of...stuff on all the clothes. After closer inspection, the stuff is pieces of tobacco, filter, and paper. There were cigarettes in his shorts. I spent an entire hour picking this crap off of the laundry before drying it. Then, I got to shop-vac the washing machine because it was full of crap.

After doing the laundry, I let the dogs inside. I leave the back door open so they will stop annoying me as I try to fill up their outside water thing. While I'm doing this, I manage to completely drench myself with the crazy hose. It has some sort of weird nozzle thing, and it's super powerful. I finally get the water thing put back together correctly and full of water. Fantastic.

I go inside, and realize that something is not quite right. There is something in the house that is not supposed to be there. It's a bird. There is a fucking bird flying around and around in the kitchen. It will not go back out the door. I try to whistle at it, which is dumb because it's a bird not a dog or a cat. The dogs are trying to grab the bird even though it's flying around near the ceiling. Finally, in a fit of "inspiration" I get the broom. So, here I am, waving a broom around at the bird trying to signal it to go out. Nothing. I'm beginning to freak a little because I just know this bird is gonna start shitting everywhere and then I'm gonna have to clean that up. Luckily, it chose that moment to flee the scene and return to its outside home. Thank god.

Things have finally settled down here. I had a cookie dough blast from Sonic, and it was excellent. I also watched the new episode of The 4400 on USA, which I love. I got to watch Robin Hood this morning (the cartoon with foxes, not the crappy one with people). Now, I'm gonna watch a little more crappy tv and go to sleep. Tomorrow can only be better...I think.

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Super Suck

Jun. 9th, 2005 | 02:43 pm

My job sucks. Super sucks. I know I say this all the time. I truly mean it. My boss is like the one on Dilbert, I swear to jebus. Ridiculous stupidity stuffed into a fat Panamanian man from Colon. Seriously. That's where he's from. It's a good damn thing I have Charles here, or I might have to choke a bitch. Fuckin Wayne Brady style.

Midget wrestling on Friday. I should seriously look into that, because it would be funny like whoa.

Barb is coming to town this weekend and I'm damn excited. I think we're going out tomorrow, but I'm not real sure. I would go out tonight, but that whole getting up at 6:45 kind of cramps my super fly-ness. It's cool because I'm still the awesomest awesome to ever be awesome. Man, my self-esteem is awesome today. Probably because I had China Hot for lunch and that is flippin sweet.

My head hurts. Kind of a lot. I think I'm getting a migraine, and I'm probably going to have to go home early because it's starting to make me a little nauseated and I don't like feeling like I'm gonna yak. Because seriously? Puking is gross.

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Jun. 1st, 2005 | 01:56 pm

I have decided to start reading The Chronicles of Narnia books in preparation for The Lion, The Witch, and The Wardrobe which begins in December. I finished the first one, and it was really good. Ready to start on the next 6.

I received a most interesting voicemail from one Mr. Nicholas Antoon. If you have never gotten one of his messages, they are awesome. It's like he's having a whole conversation with you, except he's the only one talking. The message was like, 5 minutes long and he told me all about...well, everything. I love me some Nick. We're supposed to go hang out sometime soon, possibly this week.

There's a going away party for Vicki tonight at Stray Cats. I'm not sure where she's going to, only that apparently it's away. I am undecided about my attendance as of right now. Likelihood is low for me to put in an appearance. I'm glad Dave McC called though, since I almost never talk to him. I know if I go that means Pat will be there, and I'm rather fond of Pat. He is my partner in Sprinkle Kingdom and everything. Plus he hasn't been back from New Zealand very long and I've only seen him like, twice since then. Meh. Jason gets the final say on this one.

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Duct Tape is Awesome

May. 31st, 2005 | 04:36 pm
mood: happy happy

Casey and Katherine's wedding this weekend was awesome. It was so sweet and casual and happy and I only cried a little bit. Mostly because Casey cried first. Loser.

Work still sucks, but it sucked less today.

We finished watching Star Wars: Episodes 4, 5, 6, and now are at a bit of a loss as to what to watch next. Hmm. Jedi training will begin shortly, along with the location and purchase of an Ewok because I want one like mad.

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I'm Rick James, Bitch

May. 27th, 2005 | 02:22 pm

We've been watching Chapelle Show for about 2 hours at work. It is awesome. We've been downloading all the ones we want to see. Yay. Work is much better today than it was a few days ago.

I cannot wait to be done with work for today. It's paycheck day and that's exciting. Plus, The Boy and I are going to Baton Rouge this afternoon. We get to play with my parents for the weekend, plus it is the wedding of the Best Roommate Ever, otherwise known as Casey. I am so unspeakably happy for him and Katherine that...there is nothing to say. I wish I could bring the puppies with us to the wedding, because BRE loved the puppies more than he loved us, and I sometimes think the puppies liked him better than us because Casey never fussed at them. He would just shake his head and smile at Mr. Jenkins and say, "Jenkins, why did you do that?" And Mr. Jenkins would do his cute little Jenky dance and smile and give Casey puppy kisses. It was fun. And now we don't even live in that house anymore which is super sad. Sad Kristin.

Happy Kristin!!! Roxie bought me a French present and that is awesome. I hope it's pudding in a can...or something else fun and French. Whatever it is will most likely rock most on.

Well, it appears that all of y'all are about to rock, therefore I salute you. See some of you fuckers this weekend at the wedding.

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Please shoot me right this minute before I stab somebody.

May. 25th, 2005 | 01:30 pm

I hate my job sometimes. I know I bitch about it a lot, but usually it's not that bad. Today and yesterday were awful. It is practically impossible for me to place the orders from our vendors now, because all of the employees at the vendors have become idiots. If I ever have to call Ingram Micro to try to buy something again, I think I will kill them. No, I do not have your part number for the hard drives or processors I am looking for, because YOUR WEBSITE DOESN'T WORK TODAY and I have called to have you help me FIND THE PARTS I NEED YOU BASTARDS!!!!! And Allied Semiconductor Group can kiss my ass too today because our sales rep is a moron. No, you didn't bother to tell me that those motherboards were being discontinued and that I would be getting bulk ones in the mail today. I wish I had known that, because now I don't have the CD that we need to install those you dumb bitch. What am I supposed to do with a bunch of parts that don't have the install CD???????? What? You found out after you talked to me at 3:30 that the order they shipped out at 4 didn't have one of the processors I ordered in it? You didn't call me because you thought it would be okay to just stick it in with another shipment we're getting tomorrow? You also thought you could mail me all this crap with no packing slip? Oh, yeah, that's fine. I don't need my invoice number for the accountant or anything. What? You'll email me that invoice right over? Sure you will, just like you emailed me the workstation quote I needed two weeks ago. You're the best.

In addition to the idiocy of my vendors, I had to inventory all the equipment for Specialty Risk, our parent company. While in their new cubicle office (which is awful and if I ever get a job where they put me in a cube, I'm quitting), I spent about 2 hours on the floor surrounded by surge protectors and monitors and servers and crap. Their floor apparently has some bugs in the carpet or something, because now my entire right foot is covered in little bites and it's gross. I don't go outside, so I know they did not come from there. Okay, I was outside this weekend but I spent the entire time in the pool, so the bugs most certainly didn't bite me there, plus I found the bites on my foot Friday directly after work while I was changing to go to Southwood graduation. Fucking job hazards.

To counteract the anger I have about this job, for once we are closing for a holiday. Yes, kids, I do not have to work on Monday. Thank you jebus for small favors. Oh, and by the way, I totally loved Star Wars Episode 3, and The Boy and I have now purchased Episodes 4-6. We watched 4 last night, and will be watching The Empire Strikes Back this evening after I leave Hell. Envy me motherfuckers.

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Mmm, vegan chili.

May. 23rd, 2005 | 11:18 am
mood: cranky cranky

I had the best weekend EVER and did absolutely nothing the entire time. Friday was teh suck, because work is crap. I also had to attend Southwood's graduation at the Hirsch where it was crowded and ghetto and hot. Gross. We left early since David was the valedictorian. The only good part of Friday was watching "Shaun of the Dead" at Dave McCormick and Pat's house, and we could have done better than that by going to Copeland's with the family. Oops. Our mistake.

Saturday we laid around by the pool for like, 7 hours. I got a tiny sunburn, but it's almost gone now. We rented Kinsey, but only watched the first half. Sunday we dragged ass to church to watch David get recognized for being a senior and some shit. I don't know. I was distracted by Jason's hair. After church we resumed laying by the pool, mixed with drinking, crawfish, Ro-tel dip, and cake. We finished watching Kinsey when we got home. It was an acceptable movie, but not that great. Kind of meh. I expected more from it. I also expected more from the finale of Grey's Anatomy, but it was still totally awesome. I like that show a bit more than I probably should.

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Sports Team Hilarity

May. 17th, 2005 | 12:33 pm

Blake and I regularly joke about the fact that there is a basketball team in Arkansas called the Rim Rockers. We thought it would be hilarious if we could have a team here called the Shreveport Shockers. Today a man comes in to have us do a website for him. What address does he want??? Shreveport Shockers . com. Oh yeah baby. Apparently, Shreveport has a women's football team, and THAT'S THEIR NAME! I thought I was hearing things at first, then he repeated it for me and explained it. Dear lord, that is freakin awesome. He also asked me if I wanted to play for the team, but I said no. Let's file this under Jack Abramoff.

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Canned Pudding

May. 13th, 2005 | 10:25 am
mood: bored bored

Roxie is awesome because she is bringing me canned pudding from France. I've never had canned pudding, so I'm quite excited about this.
Jason turns 21 today. He doesn't have to work now, so I'm excited. We get to go out and play for his birthday. This is the first time we've actually been able to spend his birthday together. The past two years, one of us has been in Germany for his birthday. Tonight we're going out to dinner with his family, and I'm trying to convince him that we should go to the casino. Wish me luck, because I want to go throw away some money.
Hair cut day is tomorrow, and I'm kind of nervous. It's been like, 1.5 years since I even CONSIDERED a haircut and now I have one on the schedule. I know it's only a trim, but it's still a little scary since I haven't had scissors near my head in quite some time. Eep.

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